My friend Patti says “with ease and grace” like a lot of people say “ya know”. Patti embodies the essence of ease and grace. It is synonymous with her beingness. Doing or saying anything often enough becomes part of who you are. How easy it is to spot other people’s problem of doing and saying the things they don’t want, taking a holier than Thou attitude, while we fall victim to the coined saying of AA, “what you resist persists”.
Without question most people want a life of ease and grace, and yet they continue to weave a tangled web of knots. Watching the tide of the Caribbean ocean, there is such a simple ease and grace. The ocean does not struggle with itself. It does not fight itself. Despite turbulent weather, the ocean is in control and works in harmony, albeit to the human eye it is chaotic, the ocean is unstoppable. It can easily wipe out an ocean front home and gracefully pull it back out to sea. No fuss, no muss.
Human experience is fraught with trying to fight against the oceans, the weather, our relationships, the fears that haunt us. I am reminded of an exercise I once did where I was pinned by a sumo wrestler self-defense dude. There was no way I would win against him in a struggle. What I learned was you must relax and wait for the opening to make your move. You will lose struggling against the predator. Predators show up in all kinds of outfits; stress, work, relationships, finances, food, kids, spouses. Being able to relax into the moments of stress, allows you to have the upper hand. Incredible words to live by since stress seems to be the number one cause of disease these days.
Melt like butter into your life. Feel the sensation of what it is you fear, or polarizes you, or causes anxiety. Breathe. It’s free. How else will you see the incredible life that you are journeying down? How would the leaf see the beauty of the ride if it were to resist against the flow of the river. So much to see on the ride.
Imagine the frustration of untangling mangled Christmas lights, knotted jewelry, and a knotted shoe. They might as well be the shackles of your life. “Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff, It’s all Small Stuff” written many years ago sums up the idea that the opposite of ease and grace is resisting.
Today be the observer. What are you pushing back against? Do you hear yourself whining, complaining, wishing it were not so. How can you embrace the moment blessing it with gratitude, loving kindness and forgiveness of yourself?